Police say arranged marriage led to killing

[Raw!]

Police: Daughter slain after she rejects marriage
Officials say victim was strangled after she said she wanted divorce

JONESBORO, Ga. - A daughter's refusal to stay in an arranged marriage led to her death and resulted in her father's arrest, according to police in Clayton County.

Sandeela Kanwal, 25, was strangled on Sunday, police said.

They allege that Chaudhry Rashid, 54, argued with his daughter, then choked her to death at the family home in Jonesboro.
Rashid was scheduled to appear in court on Monday.

According to a police report, Kanwal was forced into an arranged marriage in Pakistan a few years ago. Police say Kanwal wanted to leave her husband, which angered her father.

Police said Kanwal's husband now lives in Chicago.





I was always against arranged marriage. But a father strangling his own daughter? Just because she wanted to leave her husband? Not cool.

Just imagine this woman never celebrating her 26th birthday, and so on and so on till maybe 100. It's horrible.

[Iceskater101]

ok I agree with you
arranged marriages are wrong
that dude/father or whatever he is
IS MESSED UP!

[Trunks]

Some religions believe in arranged marriages... If they believe in there religion strongly, then arranged marriages are not wrong. You said your against arranged marriages, even though its part of there religion. Then you said you were against gay marriages, because its a against your religion. That's a little hypocritical isn't it?

[LiNuX]

thats sad - some cultures believe arranged marriages are the key, not religions - don't get those confused. Religions are far more spread out than just simple cultures and these are all opinions

And why the hell would you kill your own daughter for trying to end an arranged marriage? Go for her happiness instead of ending her life and then ending yours and now your whole family

retards like that just make me mad, children first...

[LemonRising]

It's all about family pride and honor.
If you're a woman and you leave your husband it looks bad. Divorce looks bad on your whole family, so your family will do whatever it takes to keep that honor. It's a cultural thing and I wouldn't say it doesn't happen, even in america.

[rukisuto]

I heard about this yesterday.
The father is trying to use that honor as a defense.
They're going to say that killing a child opposed to the arranged marriage is part of his culture and religion.
I don't think America is going to buy it.

[nemesis]

Honour may be an issue although as a father it is my job to love and protect my child, all parents should look after there kids what ever the reason you should not hurt let alone kill ur child this is another sad day humanity

[Raw!]

Some religions believe in arranged marriages... If they believe in there religion strongly, then arranged marriages are not wrong. You said your against arranged marriages, even though its part of there religion. Then you said you were against gay marriages, because its a against your religion. That's a little hypocritical isn't it?

Arranged marriage part of a religion?

I thought it was only certain countries that make you do this arranged marriage. Such as India. Not religion.

Also, if they think arranged marriage is so great, and it isn't wrong, why did this 25 year old women have to die just because she didn't find arranged marriage a good thing? Isn't it part of her religion? Doesn't she believe in that religion so much that she is willing to go marry a man her father has arranged for her?

[LiNuX]

its with cultures not even full countries that do it - you won't find any laws supported by any government saying "you have to do arranged marriages" - and these guys were definitely old school cuz even places like india and pakistan are turning western and doing it the new fashioned way of falling in love or "OH NO SHE'S PREGNANT, I GOTTA MARRY HER" lol

Parts of china still do that I believe. They used to do that in the past for inheritance rights and whatnot. Still sux she had to die. I know a girl named Kanwal - although that's her first name.

[Trunks]

Arranged marriage part of a religion?

I thought it was only certain countries that make you do this arranged marriage. Such as India. Not religion.

Also, if they think arranged marriage is so great, and it isn't wrong, why did this 25 year old women have to die just because she didn't find arranged marriage a good thing? Isn't it part of her religion? Doesn't she believe in that religion so much that she is willing to go marry a man her father has arranged for her?

Well does someone die because of an arranged marriage every time? No, they don't. It just happens to be that this time it did happen. Well, apparently she doesn't believe in arranged marriage or else she wouldn't of left him. Just because one person don't like it, doesn't mean that it is wrong.

[Raw!]

Oh my friend, it's not only one person that didn't like it. It's a lot of people that don't like it. I'm sure of it.

[Trunks]

Oh my friend, it's not only one person that didn't like it. It's a lot of people that don't like it. I'm sure of it.

So are you saying the father is the only person who likes arranged marriages?

[Raw!]

Where and when did those words come out and into my post? I said I'm sure more then the girl that was killed didn't like arranged marriage. I'm sure a lot of people don't like it, while others do like it.

[Trunks]

You acted like, I only thought that only the girl didn't like arranged marriages. I don't see how you can say its wrong.... It's there culture, people believe that, that is best. Don't get me wrong, I will marry who I want, but I still think its okay for arranged marriages.


Also, how come everyone else said it was part of there religion and when I said it I get scolded it for it. So you guys need to make up your mind.

[Raw!]

Well, my opinion is arranged marriage is bad, and as we can see, things like this could possibly occur. Which won't be good. That's why I think arranged marriage is not a good thing.

[Trunks]

Things like that can also accure when people are not forced into marriage. How many times do you hear this happening? Not often. It was just a rare occurrence it could happen in unarranged marriage too.

[Raw!]

But when it's in an arranged marriage the chances of it happening are increased because of the fact that you are forced.

How many times have you not wanted to do something, but were forced to. You were probably upset and/or ticked off. This father took it way to far.

[Trunks]

But when it's in an arranged marriage the chances of it happening are increased because of the fact that you are forced

You don't know that. I bet 90% of the people that practice arranged marriage don't mind it, because that's there "religion". Just because your forced to do something doesn't mean it is bad.

[LiNuX]

You don't know that. I bet 90% of the people that practice arranged marriage don't mind it, because that's there "religion". Just because your forced to do something doesn't mean it is bad.

its not the religion! it's the culture, the place where they come from, if someone from one religion just got arranged marriage you can't say everyone from the person's religion thinks its the right thing to do because it is culture based...

religion is far bigger than culture and they are way more spread out

[Trunks]

its not the religion! it's the culture, the place where they come from, if someone from one religion just got arranged marriage you can't say everyone from the person's religion thinks its the right thing to do because it is culture based...

religion is far bigger than culture and they are way more spread out

see wtf? When I say it people start yelling at me. Ruki said religion and nothing happened. I think it's just because I am with it and you guys are against it.....

[LiNuX]

see wtf? When I say it people start yelling at me. Ruki said religion and nothing happened. I think it's just because I am with it and you guys are against it.....

check my last reply, i said it was just culture not religion and im not yelling at you!!!! lol - explanation mark is there because people seem to just look over my posts lately

[Trunks]

My point wasn't that you were yelling at me, it was that you guys that are against only said it to me, because I'm with it.... Which is what normally happens, because most people are to hard headed to see it both ways

[rukisuto]

My point wasn't that you were yelling at me, it was that you guys that are against only said it to me, because I'm with it.... Which is what normally happens, because most people are to hard headed to see it both ways

Raw is the only one that is really arguing with you, lol.
I understand that people out there believe in arranged marriages, I just know I wouldn't want that for me.

[LemonRising]

Trunks don't get so personal lol.
Ruki said that the MAN said that he was using culture and religion as an excuse.

no one's yelling.

But I think it is somewhat religion. The religion of that culture... ugh I don't know how to explain it? It's defiantly not religion and is all culture, but I can see the two being related?


And of course I'm sure these women are THRILLED to end up with some boring guy who is as exciting in bed as watching a snail excrete mucus.
The facts are that this poor woman WAS forced into marriage, wasn't happy and wanted a divorce, and because of her family's culture, SHE HAD TO PAY FOR IT.

Also, if it's part of your culture and religion, STAY WHERE YOUR CULTURE IS. America isn't gonna be like "ohhh, your family's honor was at stake? oh well I can see where you're coming from. Here, have some brandy and we'll get you a nice hotel to stay in for the night. You poor thing."
In America it will go like this: "You killed your daughter?" "yes but because of my culture!" "50 years in prison. Don't drop the soap."

[Raw!]

I have to agree with yetcha. In America it's not how it works.

I'm sure that poor woman isn't the only person that feels that arranged marriage is bad. But most of the people that are in the arranged marriage probably feel a little mis-treated and don't like it. But they are probably afraid to confess that.

[Trunks]

Trunks don't get so personal lol.
Ruki said that the MAN said that he was using culture and religion as an excuse.

no one's yelling.

But I think it is somewhat religion. The religion of that culture... ugh I don't know how to explain it? It's defiantly not religion and is all culture, but I can see the two being related?


And of course I'm sure these women are THRILLED to end up with some boring guy who is as exciting in bed as watching a snail excrete mucus.
The facts are that this poor woman WAS forced into marriage, wasn't happy and wanted a divorce, and because of her family's culture, SHE HAD TO PAY FOR IT.

Also, if it's part of your culture and religion, STAY WHERE YOUR CULTURE IS. America isn't gonna be like "ohhh, your family's honor was at stake? oh well I can see where you're coming from. Here, have some brandy and we'll get you a nice hotel to stay in for the night. You poor thing."
In America it will go like this: "You killed your daughter?" "yes but because of my culture!" "50 years in prison. Don't drop the soap."

I love how people repeat the same thing like 100 times....
Anyway, I'm not saying that what he did was right. I said that arranged marriage isn't wrong... Get your story straight.


I have to agree with yetcha. In America it's not how it works.

I'm sure that poor woman isn't the only person that feels that arranged marriage is bad. But most of the people that are in the arranged marriage probably feel a little mis-treated and don't like it. But they are probably afraid to confess that.

You know this is true by how???

[Raw!]

I respect your opinion that arranged marriage isn't wrong.

But tell me, how is being forced a good thing? The definition of forced is strained, unnatural, or affected, or required. It means against your own will, and last time I checked, I don't want to do something I'm forced to. If I want to do that, then I will willingly go and do it, but if it turns out someone has to force me to do it, then that definately means I don't want to do it. Arranged marriage? More like forced marriage.

However, on a side note, I respect your opinion of how arranged marriage is good, but I'm trying to throw my point out there so you guys can see it also, and not just take one side of the arguement and be completely biased.

[Trunks]

Lol I am not being biased. I wouldn't want to be forced into it either. It part of other peoples culture and you need to respect that, that's all I am saying.

[LemonRising]

Good sir! My story is most straight in all and any ways! Except for c's and o's.. and s's.


here goes a hundred and one! 8D

I never addressed your opinion on it being wrong. Besides... "And of course I'm sure these women are THRILLED to end up with some boring guy who is as exciting in bed as watching a snail excrete mucus." Which is a somewhat sarcastic statement and was not to be taken all that seriously.

Just because it's culture doesn't mean it's right. -shrugs- I see that it's their culture to have arranged marriages. Other places have the culture of HUMAN SACRIFICES 8DD (azn roast, anyone?) Will you not go and say "Well the person being sacrificed and screaming for their life obviously knows that this is his culture, and deep inside, knows that it's ok. So I will not condemn them for their acts."
I was gonna mention woman in the east and showing skin and stuff, but I'm too lazy.

[Trunks]

Yes, but? People are not killing them selves. You can't compare completely different things. I think its funny that you think gays should be married. You say you should let people do as they please. Did you ever think that maybe ladies don't mind it? I don't see how its hard to understand that. Why is it just girls? Guy's don't get to pick who they marry.... I don't feel like adding anymore, I'm tired of talking about this. I don't know much about it myself. All I know is that I respect other peoples cultures... I think you should too.

[Raw!]

Girls don't mind it? Hahahahaha.

Since when did being forced to become a good thing. To be honest with you, I agree Trunks. We don't know a lot about this topic ourselves, and are only basing it on what we hear. We can never truly understand this, unless we have to go through it.

But, whenever I hear forced, I see "against someone's will" stand beside it.

[LemonRising]

Thank you for calling me a hypocrite and then saying this gem:

"You say you should let people do as they please. Did you ever think that maybe ladies don't mind it?"


ok.
Read that.
"let people do as they please."

Then go back to arranged marriage.
Which is....
FORCING PEOPLE TO MARRY!
Force.

My opinion still stands.
And it's only women because we're all biased and thats the view people take. It's easier to say just one gender instead of getting it all mixed up.
No I feel bad for the men too. Really. If they get stuck with some fat cow. Ouch right.
But in that culture women are looked down upon and if I divorce happens it'll be the wife who gets killed.
That's just how it is.
Women are inferior and don't make up things for themself.
And if they do like it?
Why would they want divorce? XD

Some may like it, but really, who wants to be forced to do anything? Let alone being forced to spend the rest of your life with someone you barely know, or may not like. And hey, if you actually fall in love with your husband and he's a good guy (see I'm sticking with female point of view but it applies to men too) then good! enjoy it! But there are many cases where that is not what happens.
Beatings and rape doesn't always make it to the news :\ or to the cops for that matter.

I respect what DESERVES RESPECT. Actually, I respect everything and then if it does something that loses my respect, well, I no longer respect it.
I gives things chances. And they flush those chances down the toilet.
Don't go off and assume that respect should be demanded and had by all.

also I can compare different things.
because they are the same. An aspect of culture.
and people are being killed over it.
So.. they're becoming the same even more! 8D

[Trunks]

Girls don't mind it? Hahahahaha.

Since when did being forced to become a good thing. To be honest with you, I agree Trunks. We don't know a lot about this topic ourselves, and are only basing it on what we hear. We can never truly understand this, unless we have to go through it.

But, whenever I hear forced, I see "against someone's will" stand beside it.

If they all hate it, why do they still do it?


YetchaGod, I don't feel like reading all that you wrote to much. All I want you to know is. Respect other peoples cultures.

[Raw!]

Aren't you seeing the picture here Trunks? They hate it, but they are FORCED to do it. We've said that a couple of times, and I didn't really have to answer this, you could've just scrolled up and read it in Yetcha's post or mine.

[Trunks]

Aren't you seeing the picture here Trunks? They hate it, but they are FORCED to do it. We've said that a couple of times, and I didn't really have to answer this, you could've just scrolled up and read it in Yetcha's post or mine.

Did you not read what I posed to you. If so many people don't like it. How come they do it?


Edit: If enough women don't like it. Are they going to kill them all. Nothing will happen to them. It's not like there tieing them down and making them marry them. They are not doing that. The women agrees to it. Are you not getting the picture.

[LemonRising]

YetchaGod, I don't feel like reading all that you wrote to much. All I want you to know is. Respect other peoples cultures.


I find it offensive you even replied to me at all without reading my post.
Re-read the bottom. or here, I'll copy&paste.

"I respect what DESERVES RESPECT. Actually, I respect everything and then if it does something that loses my respect, well, I no longer respect it.
I gives things chances. And they flush those chances down the toilet.
Don't go off and assume that respect should be demanded and had by all."



This had nothing to do with respecting culture.



[EDIT: They do it because they are FORCED. that's the whole thing we're talking about. Also, honor. It's not about wanting to do it, it's about HAVING to do it.]

[Trunks]

I read the top of it and it was the same stuff as before, so I stopped reading. They are not being phsyical forced..... It's not hard to understand. I understand what you are saying. Yes they will be shunned if they don't. If they really think its wrong, then they would of just left....

[Raw!]

Did you not read what I posed to you. If so many people don't like it. How come they do it?


Edit: If enough women don't like it. Are they going to kill them all. Nothing will happen to them. It's not like there tieing them down and making them marry them. They are not doing that. The women agrees to it. Are you not getting the picture.



I'm definately getting the picture. I read every single bit of information here in this article, everything. And with those facts I will answer your question.

The women only agrees to it because she is being forced to do it... look, if someone forced you to do something, you are doing it. BUT ONLY BECAUSE YOU ARE FORCED! Remember that. If you are forced, you do it. Otherwise you wouldn't be forced. Forced means not only not natural, or strained, but it also means doing something against your own will.

Also, this topic is NOT about other culture's respect. It's about if arranged marriage is right or wrong. Also for commenting on the article.

[LemonRising]

This girl did leave.
and she died.


See, it all comes around.
That's what we're saying.
They've trapped themselves in their culture and now they can't get out.
I think threats of beatings and death is a pretty good force, not physical, but just as effective.

[Trunks]

To me it looks like you are not seeing my point. I had to say stuff about culture because that is showing that it is not wrong. Once again I understand what you are saying I understood all 5 times you said, but do you understand what I am saying?

If I am being forced to do something I would do it? No I don't think so. It depends on what it is and the circumstances. This is a stretch here.. Let's say someone has a gun to my head and says "Shoot your mother or I kill you" That is force. I personally wouldn't do it. There for I wasn't forced into anything..... You always have a choice. Even if both chances choices are bad ones.

[LemonRising]

You were forced to make the choice. You chose your own life, but it's still a choice that was forced. Here the choice is "pure marriage, or shame". Shame can be many things, in this case it was murder, in some it's beatings, it's sometimes even rape. The women are shown this is the way, and since it's arranged, it's already set in motion. They had no choice in their arranged marriage being set up. If someone gave you the choice of an arranged marriage, or beating/death, which would you chose?
I know they see it as right, as the way things are meant to be. That is the way they have grown up and been raised for decades. The question is then, are they actually happy? Or are they being placed in their cultures blueprints for "what is right". If a woman is not happy, and then acts on it, or announces it, she is looked on in shame and shunned, or beaten/killed.
I understand they see it as right, and what our different cultures say is right differs greatly, but there is no justification for death. I'm sure many women will defend their culture to the end, but they have lived with those thoughts in their minds all their lives. To say that their culture is wrong is to bring dishonor to their culture, is it not?


Bleh Im talking too much again XD

[Trunks]

You were forced to make the choice. You chose your own life, but it's still a choice that was forced. Here the choice is "pure marriage, or shame". Shame can be many things, in this case it was murder, in some it's beatings, it's sometimes even rape. The women are shown this is the way, and since it's arranged, it's already set in motion. They had no choice in their arranged marriage being set up. If someone gave you the choice of an arranged marriage, or beating/death, which would you chose?
I know they see it as right, as the way things are meant to be. That is the way they have grown up and been raised for decades. The question is then, are they actually happy? Or are they being placed in their cultures blueprints for "what is right". If a woman is not happy, and then acts on it, or announces it, she is looked on in shame and shunned, or beaten/killed.
I understand they see it as right, and what our different cultures say is right differs greatly, but there is no justification for death. I'm sure many women will defend their culture to the end, but they have lived with those thoughts in their minds all their lives. To say that their culture is wrong is to bring dishonor to their culture, is it not?


Bleh Im talking too much again XD

So then you agree with me you said "To say that their culture is wrong is to bring dishonor to their culture, is it not?" That means you don't think there culture is wrong....

[LemonRising]

Thats not what Im saying at all.


ehhh Im too tired to explain.




but basically: culture is wack and effed up.

[LiNuX]

no culture is wrong, its tradition, people may not want to get arranged married but it may be tradition and some people feel very strongly when it comes to keeping the tradition intact

and i agree with yetcha about people wanting to die to protect their cultures - that's what the old wars were fought over, nowadays war is fought over material things

and the girl that got killed probably bought shame to the family, and they didn't say anything about the girl doing it publicly in front of people, the father could have just snapped - and its human nature to try to remain control of your kids no matter what and in some cultures arranged marriage is the way to go

[Trunks]

LiNux basically covered my point, even though he wasn't trying.

[LiNuX]

i tried to touch on everyone's point lol

the fact of the matter is, everything anybody says in this thread about arranged marriage and the guy killing his daughter are all opinions, including what i said in my last post

hope no one is getting frustrated and angry in here lol

[Eric]

If thats what they believe in, no one can really force them to change.

Sad it happened though